Acorn

Issue date: 11/12/06 Section: Opinions

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As is well known among my acquaintances, I've had a couple of interesting roommate episodes in my short time at Drew. It's been quite a bumpy road. This isn't to say, however, that my roommates have been cruel people. In fact, they've been quite the opposite. The experience alone of living with someone else that you barely know certainly takes a lot of getting used to. What's more, living with two different people you barely know is even more difficult.

Especially when most of us have just come from living in our own room with privacy-and dignity-having a roommate is just plain different. Actually, it's fairly awkward. Just as I began to get to know my first roommate, one thing led to another and she ended up taking a leave of absence.

I was alone, in a double single, enjoying the quiet life but secretly envying the relationships my friends were forming with their roomies. And coming from a rather large and rather noisy family, the silence in my room was deafening. Granted, I got a lot of work done. I got up when I pleased and went to bed as I pleased. I showered and was able to get dressed without it being a circus act. I cleaned with all OCD capabilities without being annoying etc. Come to think of it, I got somewhat used to the single life.

Then, ResLife carted in a new, "temporary" roommate. I was a bit wary at first. And when temporary has now extended past three weeks (but, nevertheless, I'm told is still temporary), I'm now experiencing what real dorm living is like. It's neither pretty nor dreadful. But through these experiences I've learned a lot, so I thought I'd spread some general advice. And thus I present to you, the Dorm Living Ten Commandments:

I.THOU SHALT NOT STEAL.

Do not steal anything of mine. Not my dry erase markers, not my stickers, not my soap. No, you cannot use my Stridex pads-I'll notice. And no, you cannot eat my string cheese-I'll notice that too. At college, everyone's poor, and every pencil, every soda and every slice of tape counts for something. And for Pete's sake, don't say borrow when you really mean use and never give back. That's just obnoxious. You may ask, and maybe, just maybe, I'll feel generous enough to give.

II. THOU SHALT KEEP TIDY.

 And I'm not just talking physically-that's a whole different commandment. If I find hair clumps of different origins scattered under my bed when I reach for a water bottle, I'm going to be upset. It's pretty frightening when your laundry pile begins to take on it's own personality. I'm not asking you to make your bed every morning or keep all your papers organized, but for the love of all things holy, if I see mold anywhere, if I find underwear that isn't mine on my bed, if I know how long your mug has had coffee in it just by the smell, I'm going to go clean Monk-style on your butt.

III. THOU SHALT NOT LISTEN TO MY PHONE CONVERSATIONS.

When I'm talking to my mom on the phone, and you slip in your opinions, I'm going to be uncomfortable. When my high school friend calls, and I can hear you giggling to my jokes, that's simply not cool. When it's my boyfriend, and you give me awkward glances, that's even weirder. Please, just pop on some headphones or focus on that term paper. Just because we see each other in towels doesn't mean we don't deserve at least a tiny bit of privacy.

IV. THOU SHALT KEEP ALL BODILY FUNCTIONS TO THYSELF.

This is self explanatory, no? The bathroom isn't that far. Make that mad dash. Hey, we can all use the exercise, right? That freshman 15-or sophomore, junior or senior-is always looming!

V. THOU SHALT BE QUIET. Or at least, the best you can. If I'm sleeping, and you plan on getting up earlier, make one trip out the door. Not 15. Just because you have an early class doesn't mean you need to get up even earlier. Just roll out of bed, get dressed and leave. That blow dryer at 8 o'clock in the morning isn't only super unreasonable, it's super ridiculous. When it's that early, no one cares what you look like. Save it for the "suite" parties (no pun intended). Don't come back at an ungodly hour and flip on all the lights. Better yet, don't turn on the lights at all-that's what flashlights are for. No, I will not sleep through it. And just as a warning, I'm not a nice zombie. For good measure, slamming doors is never, ever, fly.

VI. THOU SHALT SHOWER.

And wash your hands, and brush your teeth. If I can calculate when you've last been in the room, that's never a good sign. Hey, I understand laziness, really, I do. But not when it comes to personal hygiene. No, neither Febreeze nor that noxious perfume/cologne you wear will cover it up.  Do it for your friends, do it for me and do it for yourself.

VII. THOU SHALT NOT LISTEN TO CRAP MUSIC.

Not to sound like a music snob, but if we, perchance, do not agree on the same music taste, please do not blast the theme song to "Lamb Chop and Friends" and think it's cute. It's not, no one will like you. Invest in a good pair of headphones, and I'll do the same. Believe me, it's for our sanity.

VIII. THOU SHALT GET SOME FRIENDS.

At least for freshman year, the whole "you shouldn't be friends with your roommate" thing is absolutely true. The less we know about each other, the better. I enjoy an occasional embarrassing story, and by all means, vent some class frustrations to me. When I know things about your personal life, or when I see you lingering behind my friends when we walk to the Commons, it tends to get creepy. 

IX. THOU SHALT NOT LET THY FRIENDS SIT ON MY BED.

If I come into my room and there's someone on my bed I don't know, that's not going to sit well. Our beds are possibly the only "personal" space we have in this jail cell of a room. It's just an extremely uncomfortable situation. Especially if he or she is sitting not just on my bed but on my pillows or my papers. And if you're going to try to get away with it, at least no feet. That's just gross.

X.And finally, without further adieu, THOU SHALT WARN ME.

 A handkerchief on the door, a rubber band on the doorknob, a simple sticky note or message on the white board: anything. I'd rather be sexiled than walk in on you doing the down and dirty with that guy you just met (but hey, no judgments, right?).

Getting used to dorm living isn't easy. But following these simple guidelines may, just may, help you along the way.  However, this isn't a complete list. And some of these commandments are, of course, personal opinions. Take what you need, leave what you don't, but remember, ResLife isn't always available, and room switches aren't always an option.

With over the limit of freshmËn this year, they are most likely dealing with more important problems than your roommate leaving the door unlocked. So be proactive- prevent issues by setting guidelines now. Don't be afraid to talk about important issues with your roommate. After all, with room and board costing $9,000 each year, you deserve your money's worth.

If things don't work out, use your resources. Talk to your Residence Assistants, your Resident Director and the ResLife office. They'll come in handy, trust me.

 

Jessica Glickman is a freshman.

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